How Spammed Was My Valley


downloadAn era has ended.  A green and fertile land has grown dark.  Where once cheap sneakers and sunglasses abounded, now there is silence.

Nobody is leaving spam comments on my blog anymore.

It used to be I could rely on the spam comments WordPress filters out as a quick and easy source for a humorous post.  I’d pick out the non sequiturs and the broken English and the more outlandish claims, snark on them for a few hundred words, and call it a day.  Sure, they may not have been the deepest posts in the world, but trying to do this every single day, you throw the odd clip show in every once in a while.

It’s been months since I checked those comments.  And yes, I was struggling for something to write about today.  So I turned to my safety net, certain that I’d have a trove of unintentional comedy from which to choose.

There was one.  One.  And it wasn’t even particularly funny.  Cheap Nike sneakers.  A classic, yes, but gone was the tortured language and the random string of keywords hoping for a hit.  Just dubious urls and shoe names.  Coal in the stocking.

If that’s what was waiting for me after nearly two months, I think it’s safe to say that this particular well of inspiration has run dry.  I’m going to have to look elsewhere for cheap blog post fodder.  Good lord, I might have to back to physical junk mail.

Although I did manage to get a couple of hundred words out of not having any spam comments to write about.  That’s got to be some kind of accomplishment, right?

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